|A couple days ago I was sitting in the car waiting for Paul to finish up some business he had going on. While sitting there I decided to go through my mail which we had just picked up from the mailbox. I saw that my new health insurance information finally came after being many weeks late. I ripped open the envelope and grabbed the letter and started reading it immediately (still folded in three mind you) and I got past the first paragraph and literally took my finger to scroll up so I could read more. Instead of unfolding the paper . . . My finger went to SCROLL up. Time to step away from electronics . . . As I type this on my laptop.|
Unclad Art 2016
|So. I have been juggling a bit. Got engaged on Valentine's Day and now my fiancee actually expects me to like be a partner and help out on stuff. Ugh (insert whiny noise that only really annoying girls can make)|
It's actually nice but don't tell him that. I like a distraction and it just makes me more determined to create more art. I have long distances to travel through beautiful country one way, and then a ferry commute the other way. I have a lot of thinking during this time which is helped out by podcast subscriptions. If you have a podcast recommendation please let me know. I LOVE humorous female podcast host.
I need to share with you that the Unclad Art show is this weekend and I hope to see you there. I have 2 pieces and for whatever reason THIS one never makes it into any of the advertisements? What? Why? Soooo confused. *why isn't there a sarcasm font yet?
Edmonds Yacht Club. Yo. www.uncladart.com
When Riding Nick
Again with the mother effin' insomnia
|It's getting worse. So much worse. I have had this problem since I can remember, other than being in college and not being able to STAY awake. I spent so much time sleeping in libraries, on grass on the campus, and literally in class. I don't know that person any more. I usually go to bed at around midnight with the help of Klonzapan . . . or two if need be. If I find myself getting anxious I will take a half of an ambien. Lately it's been a whole ambien, like tonight because I'm sick of this crazy ass sleep pattern where I wake up 4 or 5 hours wide awake. That's how it went down tonight. One Klozapan, one FULL ambien at 1:40 am. Wide the fuck awake at 2 am. I have found that eating a large meal or especially carbs will mess with my sleep which did not happen tonight. I'm not dumb. I even read that your nymph nodes drain on the left which aids in digestion, so I chilled on my left. No complex carbs to spike my sugar level. Take notes to other hippy dippy things I have done to ensure sleep. Endorphin's and serotonin levels. Sleeping next to you lover can reduce these stresses and produce happy hormones. Does it work? OMG yes. I can cuddle like a mo' fo and get all the best benefits of it and he doesn't even know I'm occupying his space. He is the best sleeper EVER. So my sleep in in shifts. Once I have found homes for all of my collie puppies I can concentrate on painting which I am JUST DYING to get to again. I am completely Jonesing to start painting without out all of this nonsense. Autumn is so very inspirational to me. I can wait to create more in this theme. Poker and Pumpkins charity event is coming soon. One of my favorite parties to attend!|
Red wine and ambien
|It's only a matter of time before ambien is off the market. I self-roofie myself nearly every night. I even set a timer for a half hour and then I'm DONE. I won't remember anything thereafter. Facebook has witnessed this.|
High tech shit
|Shit is getting real. I am posting from my phone. And I am really scared because text just went from microscopic to someone is yelling in my face size. When I post this and things look weird, you'll know why. If it doesn't look weird. . . Blogger how did you know I needed to put on glasses ya freaky stalker??|
|Spoiler alert! If you follow me on Facebook, you probably saw this post. Yeah, I'm creative that way! But hey, when you are trying to market yourself and have game, you have to take into consideration ALL the effin' social media you have to do. First there's the Etsy listing- which takes awhile let's be honest. Then there's Instagram (grab your phone because you can't do that shit on the laptop!) Oh, don't forget to pin your image to Pinterest. Lastly, my sad blog you are often ignored. So without further ado. Let me repeat myself. Oh this one has a story! At my first solo gallery exhibit I had to stand around and greet people which is one of the hardest things to do for me. Normally I am really social and have no problem with groups of people. I LOVE parties and meeting new people. When it comes to talking about my art. Abhor it. I am not a natural when it comes time to "sell myself", it feels much like a job interview and I am saying the opposite of what people want to hear. But I got through the evening . . . . but the deal was that I agreeed to paint LIVE in the window the following afternoon. I just can't even. But, I did and it wasn't so bad. And this is what I created: Coquette Sisters. Instilling anxiety just like it was yesterday. (But I like how it all turned out!) https://www.etsy.com/listing/228987289/coquette-sisters-sexy-elegant-feminine|
I'm so boring
|When I first started this whole Internet thing back in the dark ages, I was one of forerunners with Ebay and HTML tags, AOL, and all that good stuff. And get this . . . I had a life! Now it seems that marketing online takes FAR more time than actually creating art. The market is saturated with other artists who caught on to this newfangled Internet thing and recently I have been spending a majority of my time researching SEO, keywords, getting noticed on Etsy, gaining more followers on Instagram, and getting Pinned on Pinterest (that was a funny). And this blog is so dusty and old- Just wondering is anybody out there? That's okay if not. I enjoy my own company. *crickets*|
|My day is like this:|
Every day is pretty much like this though. My Mom is coming into town this weekend. Little does she know that she will be helping me with Project Organize. What is funny is that I'm very organized, but once I start feeling overwhelmed by STUFF I fall into a downward spiral of disorganization. I just wish I didn't love STUFF so much. I'm such a sentimental fool. But people like being in my home even though it's never clean enough by my standards- there is always lots to see and I've been repeatedly told how cozy it is. I have friends that live bare minimally in what seems like the VERY clean homes. Not me! My home will never have a sterile feeling. My home you can accidentally break shit and I'll be like, oh. Yeah. Bummer. It's just STUFF.
But I digress. Topic at hand: Art. I have been really trying to add more and more prints to Etsy and I have 124 items right now and many more to add. It's actually really fun going through old files and finding paintings that I created and forgot all about! Many of them are inspiring to re-do some of them in more of the style I paint now. Some of them are more cartoon-like than what I paint now, but still whimsical. But check out my Etsy shop and tell me what you think. I'd love some feedback and feel free to tell me things that just aren't working for you. That's the critical stuff I need to know! www.artbyshano.etsy.com
Don't feel like copying and pasting the link? Look over to your left and there is my Etsy shop under Eye Candy. Time is precious people!
|So a couple days ago I made a post and I did re-read that night and saw all the grammar errors and crap I wanted to change. I am not going to re-read at this point and am going to leave it in its full hatchet mode. I'll revisit it later because when I wrote it, it was raw and honest and my first instinct is to edit it. Stepping away from trying to be that perfect person that everybody tries to be, and what I am going to try to be is honest to myself. So today was my last day as office manager at a real estate company. They job was great. I love the people, the job was challenging at times, and so super slack at others and I rolled with the punches, and I really, really loved it. However, I need to be true to my soul and that is working with animals because I have that gift. My soul also needs to paint and create. My entire life even before I was 5 years of age was wishing that I could be a horse trainer and artist when I grew up. Although I will most likely never be a professional horse trainer (I'm too fucking old to deal with injury) I will take a rescue horse and find the perfect home for them. My dream now is to continue with my animals and just create things that come from my soul. And I know its hippy dippy, but I believe people are put here on earth do do something with their lives- for the good or for the better. Some people say they don't have a gift and I don't believe that. What I believe is that people are put here in life to make a difference- Be it art, music, volunteering, mentoring, raising a family ... The list is endless. Everybody makes a difference in somebody's life be it for the worse or for the better. We don't live in Eutopia and some people were put here just to make everybody's life a challenge. I don't know. Let's not get too deep. That said, I will most likely lay off the heavy thinking (perhaps not right away) but I will always be true to myself and to you and fuck it if that doesn't please you. I'm at an age where my soul and happiness means the world to me. At this moment I have a teenage son who will let me sit on his bed with him as he plays video games with his friends and tell me who he is playing with and will put in layman's terms what is going on. I have a daughter who will be going to college next year who is figuring out who she is striving to be. I have an ex-husband who I can be honest with and he is honest and fair to me. Best, I have a beautiful man who is full on asleep on my couch with 2 little Yorkies cuddling him until I decide it's time for us to go to bed. Right now my soul is happy and tomorrow begins my new life. Cheers. *Unedited and Un-reread and I'm sticking to it.|
|I realize now it has been almost a year since I have posted in this ancient blog. Seeing the stats and realizing people are still seeing it is amazing. In fact, when you google Art by Shano, my blog comes up first. Embarrassing. I want my art to come up first naturally, not for people googling me to see what I was saying and feeling YEARS ago. So, let me proceed. I went through a divorce in 2010? (It was drawn out separation. Whatever) It was the emotionally most crippling thing that has ever happened to me. Just in case you're wondering if you should get a divorce and are kinda on the fence and also have kids, and just "aren't happy" . . . Don't do it. Boredom will pass. That excitement you want to feel with your spouse and just isn't there- make it fucking happen. You two are best friends and still have active dialog? Suck it up Buttercup. Marriage gets fucking boring and that's the best thing that can happen to you. I promise. Want excitement? Talk to your single friends or have a girls night out. I did. It was awesome and I still had an amazing husband. My ex-husband will always be the love of my life. My current boyfriend of more than 2 years knows this and is not threatened by this, but accepts it as it is. I've moved on from my ex-husband 100%. It really, really didn't work no matter how hard we tried, and we tried SO very hard for 18 years. Marriage counseling for most of this time . . . the whole nine yards. You can't fix broken. So during our separation I was a complete blob of jelly that did the menial of tasks. I woke up in the middle of the night with anxiety attacks and my chest in a fist of rage with fear of the unknown. I am a person that HATES change and loves making a little happy nest I call home. Sleep has always been my medic, my time to go to my Happy Place where wonderful things happened in wonderful places. I have always loved sleeping SO much because my dreams were just as real and memorable as my real life, only I simply "visited" there. Even before John and I married, our friends made fun of how much we slept and our love of sleeping in. I suppose that 2 artists living under the same roof would have the same habits. We slept as much as we loved. Artists are . . . unique. It takes a lot of patience with an artist. I am impatient and demanding and definitely fit under every stereotype of feminine. I love animals to the point where I have to cut myself off, even though I should have done it by half the animals on my ranch now. I am outgoing, friendly, controlling and emotional but stable, yet hard to get to know on a personal level. I used to have a few best friends, but since the divorce I lost them all which is so hard for me because I'm a girl's girl. They always say in a divorce, "the people you think will be there for you won't be, and the people you least expect will". Sadly fucking true. Although I have been burned, I love, love, love people in general and am so intrigued with everyone that I meet. And I know that the girls that were best friend with me in my previous life will ALWAYS be my girls. If ever needed, I would in no way hesitate to knock on the doors of Becky, Liz, Erin, Jen, Deb & Bekka, and especially Ramona and know that I would be greeted with nothing but love. You guys will always hold a special place in my heart and I love you dearly. So on with the new! I keeping true to my midnight rule that I cannot post after midnight. And to reflect back at my 18 year old self and having a 1 o'clock curfew, yeah. Shit gets real after midnight. Bad decisions are after midnight's bitch. Part 2 SOONish. (But I'm good. That's why I wanted you to see this.) There is a happy ending . . . So far. Life is a motherfucking beautiful journey. Drunk as fuck. Curse you Monday Football and Seahawks (ultimate fan here!) Will edit tomorrow. Peace out mothafuckas. (I'm apparently gansta in my over a certain age drunkness. Da fuq?) No. Now it's just full blown Tourette's syndrome.|
Fashion Illustration Boot Camp
|Fashion Illustration Boot Camp with Shano – Learn the basics of drawing the fashion figure, poses, how clothing drapes around the body, as well as makeup and facial details. Great for anybody interested in creating their own designs, future fashion designers, building your portfolio, or just for fun. Perfect for those ages 13 to 113! Dates: August 8, 9, 10, 11. Time: 11 to 1pm. Four-Day Fashion Illustration Boot Camp Cost: $125 - includes materials. Class sizes are limited- Please reserve your spot today! Classes held at Gallery by the Bay, Stanwood, WA – 360.629.4297 (www.gallerybythebay.com) Instructor is Shano firstname.lastname@example.org (http://www.artbyshano.com/)|
Once Upon a time . . .
Yeah, there's no way
|Beth of ChicGalleria.com Finally inspired me to refind my cPanel (does that just sound dirty, or is it just me?) and see where my stats were coming from. (Okay, yeah. Um. DEFINITELY dirty.) If you ever lose your cPanel info with your hosting info (For you computer savvy people that DON'T have your minds in the gutter), you might as well go looking for the Easter Bunny. My computer(s) have crashed so many times that I had given up all hope, but this time, thanks to Beth I was determined. It's been one of those nagging little things driving me crazy. |
And I feel badly. All these sites were showing the love, and I turned my unknowing back to them.
Starting now. Blogging more. Again. I saw the move "Julie & Julia" (gag). I AM A NEW PERSON.
(Yeah. We'll see how that goes.)
|August 6, 2009 was my last post? Where does the time go? What a flippin' slacker! But this time of year is always superDEEduper busy and if you read on, I'll tell you all about it and that I may or may not have a very good excuse for not posting more often. |
Let's start with if you're in the Fremont area of Seattle. My work can be seen in the Fremont Space until April 30th.
And then on May 7th it's on to the "Blue Ribbon" Show at Benjamin Benjamin in Hood River, OR
Meanwhile, I will have work in the Seagrass Gallery for the Mother's Day tour on Camano Island, WA (natch).
And making me giddy with anticipation is the Special Mother's Day Blend by Dusty Cellars Winery featuring the art of yours truly. 14.4% alcohol yo. And so far, they haven't produced a red that I haven't absolutely LOVED.
Next up . . . The clothing and accessories line. But I'll save that for next week. Want to be in the know, and probably receive a little TMI? Join me on Facebook or Twitter.
|Where have I been?|
Here in Western Washington, also known as the Seattle area there is a great phenomenon known as the sun. When it very seldom chooses to show itself, the entire population goes missing from the Internet. I am no exception. It's been sunny. I've been MIA.
Also, I have been moving from my static desktop to the portable laptop. I have a new sense of freedom. However, moving important docs, pics, and programs has been far more consuming than ever imagined. Namely forgotten passwords and Vista having a strong distaste for anything vintage.
We are getting ready to take a big road trip from WA State to Michigan. This is also quite time consuming. Today was spent researching which class trailer hitch I have on my vehicle, adjustable ball hitches (hee), tongue weights (hee), and round bar weight distributors, also known as sway bars. Sadly, I now know what all this means. Makes me almost want to be a dude and grow a pair. Okay. Not really. In actuality it makes me want to run to my shoe pile and jewelry collection and hug and kiss each and every one and give them names which end in a "y".
I have been riding my horses a lot more. In fact, I am covered in a protective layer of horse dirt. I really want to wash it off. There's really nothing magical about it.
I haven't been painting so much because I am a bit distracted with the sun, our trip, and purty horses and the such. Oh, and two litters of puppies within weeks of each other really takes up a LOT of time.
But if you want to see my latest originals and more artwork it can be seen here: http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=99376
and here: http://shano-studio.com/originalart.html
And exciting news! My art will be on the cover of the not yet released album: Cathryn Beeks Ordeal!
I'm going to have to call it a night now. Sweet dreams!
PS Speaking of which- I purchased Jewel's new Lullaby album which, I know. To each their own, but I am thinking that this is the prettiest music next to Enya that I have EVER heard.
|Mother's Day Tour - Camano Island|
Will you be attending the annual Mother's Day Studio Tour on Camano Island this weekend? If so, be sure to stop by Seagrass Gallery (http://seagrassgallery.com/) to view original art and prints by Shano.
Next stop- Wine tasting at Dusty Cellars Winery (http://www.dustycellars.net/) where you can purchase prints and limited edition signed flasks featuring Shano's newest images. *Some of which are not yet available in print!
Art Collectors? Just a head's up! There are still a few Original Artwork Pieces Left! Cleaning out the studio and over HALF the original art MUST GO! Huge paintings, small paintings, and everything in between- All one of a kind and priced starting as low as $100!
To view ALL the art click here:
To view the art on SALE click here:
(click on the original art category)
Keep up to date with Shano via social networking:
|Last night I finished another painting in the Forbearance series. Why I decided to do something so large (18" x 24") in red is beyond me. One thing that digital cameras hate is red and purple, and this little doozy was far too large to scan. So therefore, hours were spent adjusting color, contrast, saturation, and exposure. Oy vey.|
Here's the finished product:
Here's the trauma I endured:
Those smaller prints are artist's proofs. Want to know how much I spent on archival papers and inks? Yeah. I don't either.
Wanna know what else I had to endure this weekend? A bunch of crap movies. How often do I watch movies? Rarely. VERY rarely do I dedicate 2 hours at a time of sitting, and 4 hours of my weekend were wasted on brain melting stupidness that I'll never get back. Okay, yeah. The stupidness will come back to me in gobfuls, but I won't be sitting for it that long. I can almost guarantee it will be random, and it will involve public humiliation.
So first runner up in dumb movies du jour was the remake of Amityville Horror (although I fully appreciated Ryan Reynolds soaking wet and flexing his muscles.) All is not lost if you simply save your time and do a google search on screen shots of Ryan in the rain.
Winner of the Raspberry Awards was "Death at a Funeral". I think it was supposed to be funny. It wasn't. Trust me. I don't think I felt a flicker of amusement. My lips were never inclined to head North. Not even a smirk. Grimace, oh yeah. There was a poop of the face scene. That's the closest I came to smiling.
Ending it on a happy note is Ryan san shirt. He isn't wet here, but sweaty, angry, and wielding an ax. And that's hawt.
View Show and Tell of what the Easter Bunny brought
Call out of state family
Do barn chores
Pick up Easter "grass"
Pick up Easter "grass"
Pick up Easter "grass"
Cook Easter dinner
Pass out "Honey Do List"
Pick up Easter "grass"
Entertain and feed guests
Pick up Easter "grass"
Make "To Go" plates
Worm puppies and give vaccinations
Say goodbye to guests
Pick up Easter "grass"
Wait for horses to dry from the rain
Put the horse blankets back on.
Pick up Easter "grass"
It's now 6:30 pm PST. Time to digest mass quantities of ham and potatoes.
Don't want to jinx it but . . .
|House is clean|
Barn is tidy
Yard is acceptable
Orders have been sent
Updated the Original Art Page
Studio is organized
Family is healthy
Friends are well
Dogs are brushed
Animals are fed
Bills are paid
Food in the cupboards
Laundry is going
Dishes are being washed
Life is good.
PS A special rhanks Tarah for posting about my art to the Seattle PI blog! http://blog.seattlepi.com/urbanfashionnetwork. SWEET.
HUGE Art by Shano SALE
ORIGINAL ART MUST GO to make room for the new!
Cleaning out the studio and over HALF the original art MUST GO! Huge paintings, small paintings, and everything in between- All one of a kind and priced starting as low as $60!
To view ALL the art click here:
To view the art on SALE click here:
http://www.etsy.com/shop.php?user_id=99376 (click on the original art category)
The website is currently under construction, but still enabled and fully functional. To see the direction in which the http://www.shano-studio.com website is going, please take a peek. Now categorized are the Top 75 selling prints, plus all the other top selling prints. You would think it would be easy to narrow it down to 75, but not at all! Simply click on Purchase and then Limited and Open Edition Prints.
Keep up to date with Shano via social networking:
Stoopid is as stoopid does
|WARNING before you read.|
If you read my blog, you know that I don't waste my time worrying about fragmented or run-on sentences, prepositions, improper grammar, or verb tenses staying in one format, or any of that other crap that I had to actually think about when writing a term paper. If I did bother myself with such annoyances, I would never have anything to say. But rest assured, the spell check has been hit. So what if the occasional word is missing? Fill in the blanks. Your guess is as good as mine as to what I was trying to say in the first place. Point is, I was once educated, but partied too hard to retain any of the knowledge and now I'm just too tired and lazy to be bothered.
It seems that most artists post FAR more frequently than me. And although I have a lot to say, I don't always have the time to say it, or can configure any of my many random thoughts I have at any given moment in to a coherent sentence. But I'm gonna try even if it means Twitter status blogging.
And I'm going to start by blogging about nothing in regard to artwork. Why? Because I'm compiling all my existing pieces together to list for sale on Etsy or Artfire or even eBay. And because I am so completely overwhelmed by it all, I'm going to have to deal with it another time. Probably not tomorrow, but maybe Wednesday and that will be like a TON of bricks released from my chest. So, get ready because the sale amount that I sell them for is not as important is GETTING them out of my studio. Not because I don't like the paintings or they aren't worthy, but because I'm not letting myself create new paintings until I sell what I have, and that is VR VR hard. Imagine a brain artistically imploding. And now that I have a CLEAN art studio with electricity and lights, I'm absolutely Jones'ing to get in there!
So .. . On Twitter the other day I wrote a one-liner stating that I have stupid goats. Surprisingly, I received a ton of hate letters because of it. To goat-lovers: I have stupid horses some days. Stupid dogs other days. My chickens (rather John's chickens) are ALWAYS stupid. God knows, I'm the first to admit that I have stupid days. Where are the emails stating that I'm misunderstood and not stupid?! Stupid is a great adjective and noun. IMO, everybody, goat, human, or the like, is stupid some days, in some ways. Want to know how many times I followed a stupid human driving a vehicle that probably had an IQ of 150? Get over it. You are stupid to waste your time and typing fingers telling me goats are not stupid. Hey- I'm stupid for spending the time typing this to tell you that goats and other life forms can be stupid. It's all hella stupid.
On another note, I gotta go veg and be stupid because it's late and that's the only way I can get to sleep at night. I bet my goats are sleeping well though.
Definition: not intelligent; irresponsible
Synonyms: brainless, dazed, deficient, dense, dim, doltish, dopey*, dull, dumb, dummy*, foolish, futile, gullible, half-baked*, half-witted*, idiotic, ill-advised, imbecilic, inane, indiscreet, insensate, irrelevant, laughable, loser*, ludicrous, meaningless, mindless, moronic, naive, nonsensical, obtuse, out to lunch, pointless, puerile, rash, senseless, shortsighted, simple, simpleminded, slow, sluggish, stolid, stupefied, thick, thick-headed, trivial, unintelligent, unthinking, witless
Notes: stupid refers to lack of ability while ignorant refers to lack of knowledge
Safe Horses Charity Event
"Wild Mares" Original Art painting for auction
Save A Forgotten Equine presents...
HeART of the Horse, an Art Show & Auction to benefit Equine Rescue
Sunday, April 5th, 2009
exhibit 2-7pm ~ silent auction 4-6pm
1902 South Fawcett Street
Tacoma WA 98003
Hors d'oeurves will be served and beer & wine will be available for purchase
Come support local artists & photograhpers for an afternoon of Art, Photography, Music, Food and FUNd-Raising to benefit Save A Forgotten Equine (S.A.F.E.)
Unclad Art Show 2009
|Patron's Party http://www.uncladart.com/- Opening Night Gala (Click on photos to enlarge)|
From left to right: Gayle Picken (Art Show Curator and owner of Gallery by the Bay - (http://www.gallerybythebay.com/), Jamie, Jack Gunter (http://www.jackgunterart.com/), Teri, Tom Jensen (http://www.tomjensenart.com/), Alison.
Teri, Alison, myself, Jamie - I'm showing off the "red dot" on the mermaid painting, Fluidity. Yay!
Jack Gunter (http://www.jackgunterart.com/), myself, Tom Jensen (http://www.tomjensenart.com/)
Shannon Kirby (http://www.shannonkirbyart.com/), myself, Liana Bennett (http://www.lianabennett.com/)
Coylinda purchased my purse to give to her daughter. Her husband in the background is artist John Vistaunet (http://www.vistaunet.com/)
Me and Jack Gunter. I love this photo because I have no recollection of what is going on or what is being said but the body language cracks me up.
Afterwards at Amigo's Restaurant with the girls (and apparently the restaurant owner?)
Heaven & Hell
An hour nap on Sunday
A windstorm with windchimes
Telephone calls from all your favorite girlfriends
The ability to run on the treadmill
A new and improved ass from running on the treadmill (which really doesn't say a whole lot)
Wallflowers from Bath and Body Works
A full bottle of wine
Memory foam mattress
Watching and Interacting with kids during an episode of Survivor
Orders packaged and ready to go
A clean house
An hour long pedicure
Dogs that come when you call them
2 week old puppy smells inside the house
Back porch junkyard
Mentioning how awesome somebody is only to have them completely suck the next day
Plethora of drama (wtf?)
Having to wake early
Good outweighs the bad. Good vs. Evil. Glass is half full.
Too much of nothing
|Some days, okay most days, I want to do everything. I become so engrossed in everything that I do nothing. For example I just signed up to DIGG. Right now I really have no idea what that means other than I like a story or article. Same with StumbleUpon. I like it, I told somebody out there that I like it. Who I am telling this to, or sharing with is really unknown to me. Of course I could read the FAQ's, but I get spun around. I have a good sense of direction, but my ADD rears it's ugly head and I find I'm learning only bits and pieces of a whole. So I spend time exploring these technology vortexes in hopes that someday I'll know exactly what I'm doing while actually DOING it. It is a series of tangly spider webs with too many directions to venture off in, and inevitably I choose the wrong path further sidetracking me from what I was doing. Information Highway? No. It's downtown LA in rush hour with a 5 car pile up. |
The Internet is so vast with knowledge that honestly my brain can't handle it. I want to learn PhotoShop and do all the things that the kewl kids are doing. Did you know you can take free tutorials on YouTube? You can pay a monthly fee to learn just about anything at http://www.lynda.com/ (It took me 10 minutes to remember the name of this site thus adding further frustration in my quest for knowledge.)
Right now I am still trying to figure out shipping on my shopping cart and I am completely over-thinking the tables and scales mixed with *GASP* International shipping to boot. My brain is swimming. Don't even get me started on marketing, small business, and being a WAHM, as well as an artist. Just the information sites pointing to other information sites completely overwhelm me. The Internet is crack. Why can't I quit you?
Oh, how ironic!
|So yesterday I posted my "25 Random things" and quite honestly most of my Chatty Cathy girlfriends haven't responded and I'm assuming it is because of my #22. |
22. It's retarded to refer to yourself as a MILF. Let other people decide that.
So I am reading book number 4 of Megan McCafferty's series titled Fourth Comings. I absolutely was enthralled by her first two books. Number three was a little emo and whiny, and not nearly enough hot sex, but it goes with the age of the character of the time. Nonetheless, book number 4 so far is right on track. I truly appreciate the numerous references to pop culture. Megan even goes as far to refer to Dooce whom I have been quasi-following back when Heather had maybe 3 to 10 comments a day. However, being a lurker doesn't gain me any status or popularity in the Dooce world.
So, I just read page 111 (Page 109 had me CRACKING up. I mean, ROFL at her snark comment. Buy the book. Only you MUST start with Sloppy Firsts.)
So thank you Megan for your witty and snarky pop culture observances. I am right on board.
From page 109 that had me belly laughing- As spoken from Jessica, the main character:
"She was still dead serious. This reveals an elemental cause of all our miscommunications. I am fluent in snark. Bethany only notices snark when snarks grabs her off the sidewalk, throws her in the back of a sketchy van with tinted windows, drives to the middle of the Meadowlands in the dead of night, and uses a heavy blunt instrument to smack her repeadly about the head as it screams, "I'M SNARK. DO YOU FUCKING HEAR ME? I'M SNARKY SNARKY SNARK!" And even then she's like, "Ohhhhh? Snark? Is that you?"
From page 111:
"I couldn't expect someone like my sister to understand why the DONUT HO' promotion was just another pathetic example of "feminism" gone wrong. She has soared, swooped, and glided through life on the gilded wings of her golden good looks. I mean, it's one thing to be a MILF and have other people refer to you as such in private. "Now there's a mom I'd like to fuck." But it is quite another to unapologetically and unironically refer to yourself and your circle of friends as MILFs, as my sister and her friends do."
This is why I read so much. Way better than the boob tube, ya'll.
I was tagged for "25 Things"
|1. I love the smell of horses, cinnamon and clove, my husband, and Narsico Rodriguez perfume.|
2. I wear make up and fix my hair every day regardless if I leave the house.
3. I collect colorful goblets from the 70's and use them as our every day drinking glasses. If you see one at a thrift store, pick one up for me.
4. Listening to other people chew drives me batshit crazy.
5. Pretentious people are the WORST.
6. I must drink coffee every morning.
7. A microbrew with a tiny bit of bloody mary mix is the best drink EVER.
8. No wait, red wine is the best drink EVER.
9. I am obsessed with horses and my weight. Not necessarily in that order.
10. I am extraordinarily blessed for my family.
11. I love getting dressed up and wearing heels.
12. Nothing makes my eyes happier than sparkly jewelry or a cute handbag.
13. I always drive 5 mph over the speed limit.
14. An untidy house can cause me to go mentally insane.
15. I dislike cooking immensely. Loathe it really.
16. My hair won't grow but at least it hasn't gone gray yet *knock on wood*
17. I rarely get cold. My daughter is the same way.
18. I am a chronic insomniac and live like a vampire.
19. I read at least a couple books a week.
20. I like my handwriting cuz it's spazzy like me.
21. I have self-diagnosed myself with Adult Onset ADD.
22. It's retarded to refer to yourself as a MILF. Let other people decide that.
23. Race, age, political, or religious beliefs do not matter to me. If I like you, I like you. Just don't try to change me.
24. I swear like a trucker when my kids aren't around.
25. I really dig reality TV